Newsflash to my mom and Aunt Amanda: it is totally not ok to sit around discussing my weight right in front of me. I mean, who wouldn’t develop self esteem issues if every day they heard their mom or Aunt saying things like, “Tito is a little fatty” or “Do you see his rolls?” I’M SITTING RIGHT HERE!!!
I just don’t know what happened. I used to be so sleek and muscular.
Perhaps it’s the aging process. But I know so much about nutrition and exercise that I can’t believe this is happening. My favorite foods are some of the healthiest. Such as apples, with their abundance of Vitamin C and fiber.
I also like me some avocados with their Vitamin C, Vitamin K, and folate.
But my favorite healthy food of all time is the carrot. With it’s splendid crunch and punch of Vitamin A, Vitamin C, Vitamin K, fiber, and folate. Aunt Amanda even gives me her little nubs to munch on after she’s finished eating her carrots.
And furthermore, I exercise each and every single day. Mom takes me on long walks and we also sometimes do work-out videos together. Remember, Insanity?
I blame this whole fat-fiasco on Twiga, actually. I mean, if you made my mom stand next to a skinny supermodel she’d look like a little fatty too!
But, I suppose, I may have developed a few unhealthy habits that leave some room for improvement. My portion size, for example, is probably that of a dog three times my size, but I can’t help it, food is just so darn delicious. I mean, it is slightly ironic that I’m having weight problems in Africa after all. My mom is here for her PhD in nutrition for gosh sakes. And wouldn’t it be über embarrassing to leave Africa looking like this poor giraffe?
I was thinking of going to exercise after all this fat talk, but now I’m too stressed. I think I’ll sleep it off instead.